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I don't want to be stressed

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I don't want to be stressed

Tag Archives: blessings

Too blessed?

03 Tuesday Oct 2017

Posted by Andi in Advice, Attitude, Mindfulness, Stress

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blessings, control, mindfulness, positive, stress

There’s a saying that I hear people using all the time – “too blessed to be stressed”
It’s a lovely saying but I think that sometimes it’s a challenge to feel that way.  It is implying that if you have blessings (which, let’s face it, we all do) that you can’t get stressed.  Everybody feels stress and sometimes your stress can become overwhelming.
What helps is to accept that you are going through a stressful time but also to be mindful enough to recognise what you have right now (other than stress) – notice the good around you.  Even if all you can think about is that you are still breathing.

After a week of experiencing losses and deprivations – from the loss of my dear friend, to my son going overseas and going through the insomnia that comes with those worries and then going through the fast of Yom Kippur with no food or water for 25 hours, I was really aware of what I was missing.  But I was also very aware of what I have.  To be starving but knowing that a great meal is waiting for me at the end of the fast is far more than most people have.  Some people feel that way on a daily basis and they have no end in sight.

No matter how much you are going through, when your mind starts racing ahead to worry about what you haven’t got, learn to focus on what you have.
You may not be too blessed but you definitely are blessed.

You’ve got this! You can go through this stress and this worry and you will come through this on the other side.
Just keep reminding yourself that you can do it, keep focusing on right now.
“I have this, I am in control”

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Is it your disaster?

08 Thursday Jun 2017

Posted by Andi in Advice, Coping skills, Depression, Gratitude, trauma

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blessings, celebration, charity, death, disaster, donation, fires, flooding, helping, lessons, thanks, volunteer

It’s easy to get caught up in all of the drama of the disasters and bad news in the world.  And the media delight in sharing the worst of the news with us.  Social media also drives us into a mass hysteria or mass sympathy.
So this week was again filled with bad news and disasters, one after the other, and it is really easy to get depressed by it all.
If it did not affect you directly, it is not your story.
You have your own story.
Do what you can to avoid getting pulled down by what you hear about or read about.  You have no power over those things.

If those incidences like the fires and the floods and the deaths that happened this week have affected you directly, I am really sorry that you have had to go through that.

If it didn’t affect you directly then what can you do?
Firstly – count your blessings.  Take a moment to give thanks for being safe, for having your family with you.  Be grateful for the roof over your head, a home to go to (no matter how small or inadequate it may be), a warm cup of tea and a cosy blanket.
Secondly – if you feel that you need to help those affected by disasters, don’t spend time on social media using hash tags.  Rather find out where help is needed and what you can do for them.  Donate a blanket or some food, volunteer at an organisation that is giving support.
Thirdly – celebrate life.  Celebrate the times when you are healthy.  Celebrate the little things – things as small as sleeping through the night, eating an enjoyable meal, doing something that gives you pleasure.  If there is one thing that we can learn from all of this bad news, it is that life is short.  Don’t wait for one day.  Don’t wait for the big events to celebrate.
Take pleasure in what you have.
What you have is wonderful.

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Thoughts on blessings

02 Thursday Feb 2017

Posted by Andi in Advice, Attitude, Gratitude, Illness, Mental health

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access to care, appreciation, blessings, death, mental health, mental illness, poor care

This week has been a really horrible one on a lot of levels but for me one of the most horrific parts of the week was the news that 94 mentally ill patients have died in our province.  They died because they did not receive proper care.
It really opens up the conversation yet again about why there is such stigma and lack of education when it comes to mental health and illness.
My heart breaks for the families affected by this.

The lesson taken from this is how truly blessed anyone is to have access to healthcare.  Yes, it should be a right and not a blessing but unfortunately that is the way it is.
If you are not well but you have access to doctors and medication and therapists, you are lucky.
Take some time to appreciate that.
In a world where we are constantly comparing ourselves to other people, stop and look at how much you actually have.
Feeling sorry for yourself because you don’t have as much as the next person (seems to have) or you are not as healthy as somebody else is not going to help you at all.
You are so blessed to have what you have.
Don’t ever forget that!

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Count your blessings

10 Thursday Nov 2016

Posted by Andi in Being brave, Gratitude, Life Lessons

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being safe, blessings, floods in Johannesburg, gratitude

Yesterday we had the most horrific storm in Johannesburg (apparently it has not been this bad in 100 years).  And as I sit here writing this, another storm is rolling in.

It was terrifying sitting in my house just watching the devastation out of the window when there was nothing that I could really do.  We put towels down anticipating the water coming into the house but thankfully, only a trickle of water came in.
Our neighbours were not so lucky – water poured into houses, walls and trees have fallen, cars and property are damaged.  And yet, we were all luckier than others because people lost their lives last night – swept away in their cars in the storm water.

I often talk about appreciating what you have but never has it been so clear as it was last night.
As scary as it was sitting in the house, we were so blessed to be dry and protected.
It is a huge lesson in never taking things for granted.
Your house may not be great, but it is your house.  With the added bonus of a roof and walls.
Be grateful for every moment that you get to spend with your loved ones.
Focus on what you have rather than what you don’t have.
Count your blessings rather than moan about your “curses”.

To everyone – be safe, look after yourselves and your loved ones.  Material objects can be replaced, lives can’t.

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So blessed to be cold

03 Wednesday Aug 2016

Posted by Andi in Advice, Life journey, Mindfulness, Positivity

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blessings, gratitude, negative thinking, self pity, taking things for granted

So, I made my mark!
Today I voted in the local elections.  I stood in the freezing cold, icy wind and waited patiently in the queue to put a mark on a piece of paper.
Everybody in the queue was just as patient and just as happy to stand there in the cold because I think that we all realised what an honour and privilege it is to have the right to vote.
I stood there in the cold making small talk with strangers and it really struck me that we are all so lucky to have the rights that we do have – not just to vote but to do it freely.

We should never take things for granted.
Including the small things like knowing that no matter how cold we were in that queue, most of us would be going back to warm houses and steaming cups of tea.
We take big things for granted too – every day that you wake up and you can still walk and talk, do you stop to think how amazing that is?
The fact that you are healthy (okay maybe only somewhat healthy…) or that you have running water, food on your table, a warm bed, a roof over your head and (very important to my kids) access to wifi!!

Whenever you feel yourself slipping into self pity and negative thinking, please just take a minute to list the things that you do have.
You always have a choice – do you focus on what you do have or do you cry about what you don’t have?
Yes, there are always going to be people who are happier, healthier, wealthier and more successful than you but there are also always going to be people who look at you as somebody happier, healthier, wealthier and more successful than them.
Think about it!

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Be headline worthy!

31 Thursday Mar 2016

Posted by Andi in Advice, Coping skills, Life Lessons, Positivity

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blessings, headline worthy, headlines, newsworthy, positivity, tokoloshe, worthiness

I wasn’t having the best of days yesterday – in fact it was a decidedly ‘blah’ kind of day.
It wasn’t that terrible but just ‘blah’ enough for me to be fantasizing about a better life in more tropical places that Johannesburg.
That was until I bought a copy of The Daily Sun – that mine of information and news – and saw this headline:

IMG_5809

And suddenly, just like that, my day improved vastly.  No matter how tired I felt, I realised that I was truly blessed not to be unfortunate enough to have a tokoloshe tracker in my bum! (If you don’t know what a tokoloshe is, I suggest you Google it…. and I’ll leave you to form your own opinions about it).
The Daily Sun’s headlines are a bit extreme but you can read any newspaper on any day and realise that you are far more blessed than you believed you were.
In fact, my daily mantra is that if I am not on the front page of The Daily Sun, then I’m doing alright.

There are people whose lives are so stressful and their conditions of living are so horrific that they would wish to have your kind of problems.
Yet at the same time, there are people who you may envy because their lives seem so much better and less stressful than yours.
So where do you fit in the greater scheme of things?
Probably somewhere in the middle with a leaning towards the more positive side.

Take a moment to appreciate what you have rather than stress about what you don’t have.
Be gracious enough to know that although your life is sometimes really tough, you are also so blessed too.

Make sure that you live your life in such an amazing way that it is headline worthy (with an exclamation mark!).

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All for a cricket bat

20 Thursday Jun 2013

Posted by Andi in Attitude, Gratitude, Life Lessons, Positivity

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balls, blessings, cricket bats, garbage, gratitude, kindness, recycling, smiles, thankfulness

Wednesdays in my neighbourhood is garbage collection day.
Early in the morning, way too early actually – especially in winter when it is cold and dark, we hear the sounds of the ‘recycling guys’ carts rolling down the hill toward our street.
I think that they do a wonderful job and that they are true entrepreneurs in an environment where there is no formal recycling.  They fill their carts with plastic that they often dig out of the bins and then walk a very long trek up hill back to the recycling  yards.
It always upsets me when I see them.  They do us such a great service, protect our environment and all for very little money, probably no thanks and a lot of physical labour.  And that makes me sad.
This Wednesday I went outside early in the morning to leave some cricket bats on the pavement for collection by whoever wanted them.
Let me just point out that the reason we have so many bats is because my kids are probably way too spoiled and they get new sports equipment way too often.  Just because they can.
Anyway, as soon as I took the bats out, I noticed a guy with his cart running towards me.  As soon as he opened his mouth, I realised that he was just a child.  He asked if he could please have all the bats so that he could play with his friends.  I gave them to him and asked if he had a ball. He didn’t and I went inside to get one out of our bag filled with balls.  When I passed the ball to him, I noticed that he had wrapped an old cloth around his hands to keep them warm.  It just broke my heart and I ran back inside to get him a pair of gloves.

There were two lessons in this experience for me, besides having a good cry in my kitchen:
Firstly, I had a week where I was really worried (unnecessarily) about money because I have had so many expenses lately.  We tend to forget how much we really have until we are faced head on with people who have so much less than us.  We shouldn’t have to wait until then to really stop and count our blessings.
Take a few moments everyday to think about what you have rather than what you don’t.  Be grateful for your blessings rather than worry about when you are going to have more.  Your old car may not be as fancy as your friend’s newer model, but it is better than somebody else’s bicycle.  And that person with only a bicycle is better off than somebody who doesn’t have one…
You have so much more than you realise and you are surrounded by countless blessings that you forget to notice.

Secondly, it doesn’t take much to make somebody’s day a lot better.  You can get so much from giving.  I may have given a bat and ball and a pair of gloves but you don’t have to give anything material.  Give a smile, share a laugh.  Wave at somebody in the traffic who looks like they need cheering up.  Hold the elevator doors open for a elderly person or for a person who is in a rush; let somebody in front of you in a queue.  Greet everyone that you meet, even if they don’t greet you back.
You may just find that by cheering somebody else up, you cheer yourself up in the process.

I would love it if you let me know what you did to make a difference this week.

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