Tag Archives: mindfulness

Take this moment

16 Thursday Nov 2017

Posted by in Advice, Attitude, Coping skills, Mental health, Mindfulness

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Having control over our lives is what we all want.
Having control is what most of us don’t have.
We fantasize about it, we dream about it, we work hard at getting it back yet it seems that there are always going to be times when control is just something that we don’t have.
It is so difficult to feel that your life is not really yours, that there is some unseen force that is making your life miserable.
And to make it worse, there is always someone around you who seems to have it all sorted out – they drive a better car, have a better job, have more success, their kids are high achievers.  This makes you feel even more miserable.

What if you can let all of that stuff go?
Can you make this moment, this moment right now, the best moment for now?
I’m not saying it is brilliant, but just for now, you have absolute control over the moment.  You can decide how deeply to breathe, you can decide whether you want to walk or run or dance.  You have a choice to smile or to frown, to sing or to stare out of the window.
They may not be big things, but they are yours.
Make the absolute best of this time.  It is the only thing that you can do.
What will happen next?
I don’t know!
Are you going to be okay?
I don’t know!
But I do know this – you have the ability to keep on surviving, to stand tall, to make a difference, to let go of some of your worries, to throw caution to the wind.
You can do all of this if you just take this moment for you.

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Too blessed?

03 Tuesday Oct 2017

Posted by in Advice, Attitude, Mindfulness, Stress

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There’s a saying that I hear people using all the time – “too blessed to be stressed”
It’s a lovely saying but I think that sometimes it’s a challenge to feel that way.  It is implying that if you have blessings (which, let’s face it, we all do) that you can’t get stressed.  Everybody feels stress and sometimes your stress can become overwhelming.
What helps is to accept that you are going through a stressful time but also to be mindful enough to recognise what you have right now (other than stress) – notice the good around you.  Even if all you can think about is that you are still breathing.

After a week of experiencing losses and deprivations – from the loss of my dear friend, to my son going overseas and going through the insomnia that comes with those worries and then going through the fast of Yom Kippur with no food or water for 25 hours, I was really aware of what I was missing.  But I was also very aware of what I have.  To be starving but knowing that a great meal is waiting for me at the end of the fast is far more than most people have.  Some people feel that way on a daily basis and they have no end in sight.

No matter how much you are going through, when your mind starts racing ahead to worry about what you haven’t got, learn to focus on what you have.
You may not be too blessed but you definitely are blessed.

You’ve got this! You can go through this stress and this worry and you will come through this on the other side.
Just keep reminding yourself that you can do it, keep focusing on right now.
“I have this, I am in control”

Universe 1 – Me 0

11 Friday Jul 2014

Posted by in Advice, Attitude, Gratitude, Mindfulness, Quiet and slow

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I am absolutely exhausted!
My son was ill all through the night and I didn’t get much sleep.  So today has been a slow one – I can feel that I’m not working to my fullest potential and I am falling behind in my work as I write this.
But it is OK.

Earlier in the week, I was running late for work and as I finally managed to get through the front door to be on my way, a friend of mine arrived at my door to drop something off for me. Delay number 2… I sighed and then tried to tell them as politely as possible that I couldn’t chat because I was late.  I still had to pick up my laundry on the way to work and when I got there, what a surprise, it wasn’t ready and the lady asked me to wait while she ironed the last two items.  Delay number 3… Finally, on my way and there was construction work on the road and traffic came to a standstill.  Delay number 4!
But it was OK!

It was OK because I really believe that things happen for a reason.  And on that particular day, there was some reason why I was meant to be late for work.  I don’t know why or if there even was a reason but I took a deep breath and realised that if it was out of my control, then stressing about it would hardly solve anything.
It felt like it was: Universe 1 – Me 0!
Yet, I calmly accepted it because there are going to be times in our lives, whether it is as simple as being late for work or as complex as a major life stressor, when we just don’t have control and we need to accept that.
There has to be a greater purpose out there that we just don’t have the ability to see in the present.

Let life take you where it is going to take you – but that doesn’t mean that you need to be a passive passenger.  It may not go according to your original plans but you still have the ability to take what life throws at you and work it in your own unique way.
Even if it is just a lesson in humility or gratitude.
You are more blessed than you realise!

The slow life

06 Thursday Mar 2014

Posted by in Attitude, Life journey, Mindfulness, Quiet and slow

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I left work today and slowly made my way home.
I say slowly because for some reasons beyond my simple understanding, there is no electricity across a large area of the city, and therefore no working traffic lights.  And of course there lots of manic drivers who treat the traffic light free roads as their own personal race course – don’t mind me stopping to check that it is safe to go through the intersection!  This is Johannesburg after all.
I finally get home and surprise, surprise – there’s no electricity here either.  And I’m stumped.  I have work to do that needs a computer and I am in desperate need for a cup of tea.
For a few minutes, I wandered aimlessly around having a good old moan about the inconvenience.
What could I actually do?
Just sit? No, that would be lazy… Although if there’s nothing else that I could do, and it was out of my control, then why shouldn’t I just sit?
And suddenly the sun made an appearance so I sat in a spot of sunlight and just enjoyed it. (For those of you who are not in Johannesburg, we haven’t seen the sun for days now).
No tea? I opened the fridge and freezer to get inspiration and amazingly – some kind (or silly) person left an ice cream in their uneaten.  Problem solved!
I got to spend some quiet time just sitting in my sunny spot, ice cream in hand – nothing wrong with that!

There are going to always be times in life when things just don’t go our way.  And we can either fight it and feel stressed or we can choose to just go with it.
Often it is far more complicated than the electricity being out.
Life is not always going to go according to your plans and from my experience, it is going to go against you more than it is going to go with you.
But if you graciously accept things the way that they are, with little or no regret, you are more likely to succeed than if you are always fighting life.

When you get up in the morning, tell yourself that you are going to take life as it happens.
If you’re running late, so you’re running late.  Didn’t get that promotion? He didn’t call back? You didn’t pass that test?  It happens!
Move on, move forward – you may discover things that you never even thought possible if you allow yourself the opportunity to go with it, and grow with it too!